So – change is upon me.
I have felt it creeping in on my life, trying to rear its ugly head for a few weeks now.
I’ve tried to put it out of my mind, to not think about it until I have to, and well – now I have to.
If you remember; I don’t do well with change.
So here they are, the new changes I’m still trying to wrap my head around..
Reason #1:
My baby is 8 months old now….
He’s getting bigger. His body looks long in my arms, When I look at him in sleeping in his crib he looks like he finally fits in it.
He says ” Da Da”, he eats solids – like real food, our food.
He rolls around the house, he crawls backwards..
And oh yea –
He finally sleeps through the night.
I feel like his ” baby – ness” is slipping away from me . I know what lies ahead in the growing bigger journey and I’m just not ready.
But I can’t slow down time so I’m gonna roll with it, and try to embrace what “growing older” will mean, to imagine what it will look like “then” and just know no matter how old my kids get, they we always be my babies.
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Reason #2:
My BFF, my mommy friend, my sista from another motha, my maternity leave partner is going back to work tomorrow.
How will I get through the summer without her?!
We talk every morning, we text each other all day. We see one another at least three times a week.
We do Mommy things, we have coffee dates, play dates. Random, spur of the moment stop by each other’s house kinda things.
We really do everything together.
And I’m afraid life won’t be the same without her.
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Reason #3
Berry Season is just around the corner.
I’m pretty sure this is the latest season in history, so we are running on borrowed Daddy and husband time at the moment, and for that I am thankful.
But…
Life without him for 60 days straight, just flat out sucks.
I’m partly traumatized from last year when I was 8 and 9 months pregnant looking after Levi on my own. Having to be the house keeper, do all the yard work, bring meals, etc.
It also didn’t help that Levi, who doesn’t handle being sick very well, contracted hand, foot and mouth ” disease” and some other random, weird virus later in August that I ended up contracting, that then spread to my eyes..
I know blah blah blah- poor me…
But I wouldn’t want to switch places with him – ever.
I’m thankful that at least I get to stay at home with the kids, see them and spend time with them.
Poor Steve doesn’t, and he’s already said to me how sad he is about all the things he’s gonna miss out on.
But we have to remember; this is what pays the bills the rest of the year.
It provides the food we eat, the roof over our head, and gas in our tank.
But I’m still gonna miss my other half.
My babies Daddy.
The one who helps bath kids, clean – up dinner, and snuggle little ones to sleep.
The one who teaches Levi how to golf and play hockey.
Who runs around the house for hours playing hide and sneak.
The person who fill in the gaps, where I can not.
Pretty much, he’s irreplaceable.
And I thank God for him everyday, because I know I’m so lucky.
And so are our kids.
So here we are a new season of change…
I don’t like it, but its inevitable so let it be.
But, still – Change sucks.