Levi is 4

I haven’t had the time to personally blog lately and I hate that. I like being able to write down and compartmentalize all the zillion thoughts I think about day to day. But life gets busy, and these things get pushed to the back burner.
But there is one very important day I’ll always make sure I document,  my kids Birthdays.
I don’t know why it’s such a big deal for me…
But it really is. Not just for my kids, but for all the special people in my life, I really do try to make it special. I think it’s because it’s the only day once a year that is truly yours. And, because obviously I’ve been obsessed with birth since as long as I can remember, it’s the day you entered the World, its kinda a big deal.
Every birthday my Mom would re tell me my birth story, as a Mom now myself I know why. It’s the most sacred day of your life. The day I  met my children will be forever etched into my mind forever. Of all the great moments of life this tops the list for sure.
My Mom above in labour with me

Me –  just born! Circa 1984

Steve and I talked about it last night, how this time 4 years ago we spent our last night ” alone ” together.  How we had no idea what we were in for.  How our lives would change in ways that no matter how much people tried to prepare us,  we would never fully understand.
We laughed about how we had no idea what we were doing when we brought him home. These poor first borns really are our practice run. But shucks, they seem to always be the best behaved, and most successful, so we all must be doing something right.

I’ve been extremely emotional today, crying when we sang happy birthday, crying when I snuggled him this morning on the couch, crying while I write this… The passing of time always does tend to make me emotional, and God only knows the mess I’ll be next year when he turns 5….
These little ones just grow up too fast, and it scares me…
However, parts of me are excited for what 4 years old has to offer. 3 has been my most challenging Mommy year yet. I believe all kids go through a hard stage at different times, but 3 for Levi was, to say the least,  mentally exhausting.

But no matter how challenging,  he’s still the same kind hearted, gentle spirit he’s always been. He still smiles and smells like he did when he was a baby.

He’s my comfort,  my best friend and like I tell all my babies,
“Your  my everything,  I love you more than,  everything.”

Happy 4th Birthday Levi .